Don't let small children read this.
I am totally blowing it on the Santa front. The Diva is into Santa this year. I am not sure how she even knows much about the jolly old elf, since I have been skirting around the subject as much as possible. But oh no, it hasn't stopped The Diva. She could totally pick the dude out of a line up and she noticed him on a Coke can today. "Look Mommy, it's Santa!" She exclaims, whenever she gets a glimpse of the big guy. With Christmas all around us already, she is noticing him more and more. She even has a list for Santa- tap shoes and a tap dancing dress ( what the hell is a tap dancing dress anyway? If anyone knows, please tell me, because The Diva sure wants one.)
But alas, the problem is with me. I have been avoiding Santa because I have issues with him. Well, with the actual non-existence of him. (Are you following me?) Santa isn't real. I am feeding my daughter a pack of lies. She trusts me completely and counts on me to tell her what is what. And I am lying to her. I am telling her that an imaginary guy is coming to our house to leave presents. Not just for her, but for sweet little children all over the world. My best friend and my mom think I am a nut job. I think they are both afraid I am going to blow the whole thing. "Believing, is part of the magic of Christmas", they say. "Don't you remember Miracle on 34th Street??? My exasperated mother exclaimed. I am going along with it, but slightly grudgingly, because I just feel dishonest. I can't remember when I found out Santa was my parents and I think it must be because the whole thing was so traumatic that I have blocked it out to protect myself from the pain. I should have caught on quickly though; we never left cookies and milk for Santa, we left Cookies and Pepsi. My dad drinks Pepsi so much I think he might just bleed Pepsi. Coincidence? I think not!
So tonight Santa came up in conversation with The Diva, and I tried to be good, I really did.
Me: Santa is going to come to our house late on Christmas Eve
Diva: To sleep OVER????
Me: (Trying not to laugh) No, he won't sleep over but...
Diva: (All wide eyed and serious) What Mommy, what will he do?
Me: He's going to sneak into our house while we are sleeping and .......... here Diva, let's call Aunt Shell and she will tell you all about Santa.
I was laughing so hard on the inside I thought I might explode. I may have issues with this thing, but here I am making Santa sound creepier than I already thing the whole thing sort of sounds. He SNEAKS into the house??? I think I get a big fat F on this one.
6 comments:
Aargh, I totally don't want to tell her Santa is real either! I think we're just going to treat it like a story, like other stories we tell. I just wrote my blog post for tomorrow (I'll publish it in the morning) and it's about a similar issue of "honesty" with kids.
I lost my entire comment! Ugh.
Anyway, I agree with both of you. Originally and before having a child I thought allowing our children to believe in Santa was harmless...my husband and I had this conversation a thousand times (since my brother doesn't celebrate Santa in his house for religious reasons). Now, though as baby G gets bigger and the season is nearing- I get extremely nervous of the prospect of telling him about Santa. It all seems stupid to me. A positively commerical gimmick for parents to buy into and at the sametime deceive our little ones and rob them of the true meaning behind christmas.
I haven't told my husband my recent thoughts. What are your husband's opinion on this? And how do you find a middle ground if you disagree where you once agreed?
BTW, if you didn't know already-Great post!
HeHeHe. Luckily you only have to deal with this for the next 8 yrs. Unless you have another one of course. lol. Although I see your point, I am with Mom and Aunt Shell on this one. When i found out Rick's kids didn't believe in Santa at 6 and 8 years old, I was appalled. I re-convinced them of the jolly-old-man's existence. Well, at least I like to think I did. If I didn't, they sure did play along well. Of course when Rainia found out about the Easter-bunny last year it was the most heart-broken I have ever seen her. And I remember my own pain as a 10-yr-old. Yes, TEN, when i discovered the truth.
I do understand your struggle. I went through the same thing with my son when he was younger. What I ended up settling on was telling him that Santa only brings presents to people who believe in him; for everyone else, the parents do it. So when he figured it out, we talked about what I'd always told him. We also discussed how Christmas and Santa are a huge part of American culture that I didn't want him to miss out on. He's happy that I was essentially honest with him all along, thereby preserving my, "Have I ever lied to you?" statements.
Best wishes,
Shan :+)
Ooooo, Shan, Good one.
I'm glad I am not the only one out there with conflicting feelings.
My husband is pro-Santa, but he understands that I am having issues, so Santa is coming to our house, but as low key and factual as I can make it. That's our middle ground.
Shan- I like what you did with your son, I may try that approach!
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